Chapter 539: The Old Times Never Stopped

Unlike the urging of family members and the supervision of teachers, these determinations come for inappropriate reasons, but they are most appropriate.

His determination was not born out of jealousy, and he has not yet shown clear determination. There were too many good things in the past, and most of those good things have disappeared as his grades have gone downhill. Although his parents have never said that they will reduce their love for him, there has never been any sign that they have invested more energy. In the process of growing up, if there is no more energy to cover, it means that some of these reasons have gradually faded.

There are many critical moments in a person's growth. They may not matter on ordinary days, but they must not be missed at critical moments. However, if they only appear at critical moments, it is better not to appear. Hypocrisy does not necessarily defeat indifference. Hypocrisy is only good for hypocritical people.

"Why did Dad choose this school for me? Is it because my grades are too bad? Is it because it is close to home? Why did I only come here in junior high school?" He didn't hate his current life, but felt that everything could be better, although the chances were slim.

When was it? Fourth grade? Fifth grade? At that time, his parents would watch the animation with him and discuss the plot. It was really strange. Although they didn't know the plot and only watched a small part, they could already talk about a lot. It seemed more interesting than the animation itself, and the plot of that part left a deeper impression on him, which is still clear to this day.

Although I have never reviewed the plot since then, whenever I think of those words, the admiration and excitement at that time come flooding back. It's like leaving home for a few years and returning to find that the originally backward village has night lights. Even if there are no night pedestrians, I am still happy. Villages, pedestrians, night lights, and a few years are enough to change a person's impression of night lights.

Grandpa and grandma had gone back to the countryside, and he was the only one at home. He remembered that his father had a long New Year's holiday during the Spring Festival. The reason why it was called long was that time was still kind, stealing the night, extending happiness, adding variety, and making people talk more. There was a very interesting game on his father's mobile phone, which seemed to be about hunting dinosaurs, and then raising the dinosaurs that were hunted. The dinosaurs could also be upgraded. The operation was simple, and he could play it for an afternoon.

There are other activities at night, such as playing cards. The family gets together, and the winner gets his share, and the loser doesn't count. Although the game is not big, one night can save half a month's pocket money, but at that time it really doesn't cost money. It is worth mentioning that my father's annual leave is ten days, which is eight or nine days without the round-trip travel. There are many activities and various activities.

Dad's workplace must be far away, and he can only come back during the Chinese New Year or major festivals. I can see him less than ten times a year. What a happy elementary school was, the happiness there is no longer traceable. Many of the misunderstandings I had at that time still seem so beautiful now. For example, Dad's workplace is not far away, and the reason why he didn't come home frequently is that he also has his own pursuits, not every holiday should be shared with others, no matter what others expect.

He saw his mother more often because she lived in this city. He felt that his mother was richer than his father, and he still felt that way. Although they saw each other a lot, neither of them was completely wise, and the quarrels were enough to offset the extra meetings and irrelevant company. Especially in the second half of last year, he had just entered junior high school and still had a little bit of eagerness for the future, and this initial test could be named "If for freedom".

Freedom is a good thing. The predecessors died for it, but they still continued to pursue it. For him, freedom certainly does not have such a big risk, so he needs to try it more. More and more attempts are constantly consuming the wisdom of both parties. One wrong judgment after another makes the remaining expectations precarious. They are obviously the closest people, but they are not as close as classmates in school. It's really strange. He didn't have this idea until he entered junior high school. Before that, he would never compare the two.

He tried to recall past mistakes to find a way out. Which dispute started the rift? Was it the time when he was blamed for not being able to understand English words? It was probably not the first time, but he didn't remember much about it and couldn't tell which time was the most intense. Or was it because he was picky about food and made his grandparents angry? That didn't seem like it either. It couldn't be that he was retaliated because he ignored them while doing his own thing, right? Impossible. Then it seemed to be because he was addicted to games? No, that wasn't it, because he wasn't addicted to games anymore. Which time? None of them seemed like it, because these were all trivial matters, trivial matters that could be tolerated in the name of parents. As long as this title still existed, these trivial matters were insignificant. Did something happen that violated the parent-child boundary? Was it suspicion of them? Was it a denial of them? Was it disgust with their attitude towards life? Was it a disagreement with the way they treated others? That wasn't right, shouldn't he be so petty? He began to think about that kind of selfless love. He felt that this kind of selfless love seemed not as good as the two students behind who cared for each other, because their care came from knowing each other first, while the selflessness of parents depended on blood. Although it was more patient, longer-lasting, more valuable, and contributed more, it could not be considered selfless, right? However, the two people behind were definitely not selfless either. How should we describe it? He fell into deep doubt. This was a very philosophical question. Everyone had a different answer, but in fact there was a correct answer.

When was the last time he saw his parents? Was it during the summer vacation? When did it start? Not sure. When did it end? Not sure, but he remembered that the day it ended was not as good as he had imagined.

More memories can't bring any redemption, but in the process of recollection, he can redeem himself and redeem the sorrows and joys that belong to him. He is not only exploring the relationship between his parents, he has many classmates, some of whom are quite important. They have agreed to meet, although it will be many years later, but it is really exciting. People who clearly only live in the past, make people want to imagine the future for them. He suddenly remembered that his parents had broken their promises, so it would be a pity if his classmates did the same.

"Classmate, will we see each other again after graduation?"

"do not know."

"So, Lin Xuran, do you still want to see me after graduation?"

"do not know."

The above conversation was what he imagined. It didn't happen, but even so, he could guess the answer to the question. Even if it wasn't necessarily accurate, it wouldn't be that he didn't know. The answer to the first question was no, because she looked too much like someone who died young. The answer to the second question was no, because he wasn't an important person at all, and Lin Xuran had no reason to care about the feelings of someone he just met. She was that kind of person, and I was this kind of person.

"What a pity that so many good people only have two years to spend together. The future is really not easy to look forward to. Those who look forward to the future are so confident that they can come and go in the changing time and get the stories they want." The thinking of young people is always too limited. Time is definitely not just about changes and exchanges. Before fully understanding the meaning of time.

(End of this chapter)